While you can’t literally build a wall around yourself, you should absolutely create boundaries and defend them. This is really important because it protects your energy and emotions. Once you define your boundaries, you will be able to confidently reject things that will pop your happy bubble.
At first, you might feel guilty or selfish when you start enforcing your boundaries but you
have the power to define what you tolerate. This might take practice and determination but don’t let this stop you from caring for yourself.
- Figure out what your limits are. Consider the types of activities and people that you can tolerate versus what makes you feel exhausted or overwhelmed.
- Just say no. Once you’ve defined your limitations, now you have to stand by them. So if someone asks you to do something that doesn’t work with the limitations you defined above, just say no. You don’t even owe them an explanation. Most people will accept “I’m sorry but I can’t” without you going into further detail or making up a reason why your answer is no.
- Be direct. In the tip above, I said that most people will accept when you say that you can’t do anything but naturally there will be people who are pushy and try to bully you. With these people, the only thing that you can do is have a direct conversation about how you can only dedicate your time and energy to things that are important for you.
- Serve yourself first. The purpose of having defined boundaries is self-care. If you are emotionally drained, you won’t be able to give your full energy to things that are important to you.
- Lean on your support system. I am the kind of person who will spread myself thin then be frustrated that I let it happen. My husband is great at pointing out when I’m getting sucked into something that I don’t have the time or energy for. Having his support helps me to feel confident when I have to turn someone down.